NCI What?
by missinoutonlife
Summary: It's their story. Their pain. Their love. Their heartbreak. Starting as soon as Abby finds out about NCIS to a tragic accident that ends it all.
1. NCIWhat?

A/N: Sorry this first chapter is so short. Some of the chapters are shorter or much longer than the others. I have 10 chapters written out so far and have about 2 more to write then i'm done so i'll be updating frequently. Enjoy.

This is our story. It's wonderful, it's tragic, its painful, its funny, its great and its horrible memories all wrapped into one thing, love. I loved him. I wish I could say love, because of course I do, but saying that, in the present tense, just doesn't sound right anymore. Not when he's not here to hear it. This is my way of trying to get over him, my way of trying to get ride of the pain. It probably won't work but at least I tried, he would want me to at least try.

**1. NCI- what?**

I looked at her like she was the strangest person on the face of the earth. She was supposed to help me find a job, not make me look like an idiot. She seriously wanted me to send in an application to these people. It was part of the Marine Corps for heavens sake, these people would eat me alive.

"Come on Abby this place is a great place to work at." She shoved the application into my hand again, trying to make me reconsider.

"Julie I don't even know what NCIS stands for." I didn't want to work at a place like this. They seemed like a bunch of paper pushers, way far down on the marine food chain. Up until Julie showed up at my door and shoved this stupid application in my hands I had never even heard of NCIS. I looked at the paper, turned to her and quite blatantly said, "NCI- what? Are you seriously trying to get me to consider this application cause I'd rather burn it."

She pushed and she pushed. She showed me some info on NCIS, explained to me what it stood for, and showed me all the pro's for working there. I personally thought there were more cons than pros.

I stood up from my chair, pushing it backwards with my black booted foot and turned to look at Julie. "Julie look at me. You see this tattoo, and this one and this one, I've got more tattoos than you'll ever see. Now look at the way I dress. You see these chains, all this black? Do you think a place like _NCIS_ would actually hire me? They'd probably search me for drugs, then run about a million drug tests to see if I'm a druggy and then when they can't find anything they'll do the test again and again." I folded my arms in front of me and stared her down.

She stayed seated, the stubborn woman she was held strong against my complete disregard for this place. It was a long night of her pushing and me wanting her to go away. Eventually I suffered from Caf!Pow shortage for so long that I finally gave in. What a great friend Julie was, she wouldn't even let me leave my house until I considered the job.

I went to the marine yard the next day. The director was busy so he passed me off to Special Agent Gibbs. I had only talked to the man for five minutes before I figured out I hated him. Later on it shocked to me that I ever hated him.

Every time I tried to explain something he would give me one of those "bottom line" looks which I had come to get used to because of an old friend of mine, Chris. I must have said something right because I got a call from him the next day. He simply said "Be here tomorrow 0800 sharp." And that was it. No hello, no goodbye, nothing, he just hung up on me.

I put the phone down and stared at the fridge for while. I didn't want the job. I had told Julie that enough times. But then again they wanted me to work for them even with my appearance it didn't seem to affect their choice. Well actually his choice. So I sat and stared and then suddenly it hit me. "Oh shit, what the hell is 0800?" Yeah I'm just that stupid.


	2. GibBastards

A/N: Sorry another short one. I hope you're enjoying it so far.

**2. Gib-Bastard-s**

He seemed to get on the nerves of everybody and I could completely understand. That first day I started he came into my lab half an hour after I got there. I didn't know what to do so I just looked around the lab. He breezed in like he owned the world, a coffee cup seemingly attached to his hand, and pointed around my lab. "This is your lab. You're on my team. Ducky's in autopsy and DiNozzo is my senior special agent." And then he left. Just like that.

Just as he was about to enter the elevator I rambled to myself about how much of a bastard he was and then he suddenly turned around before he stepped onto the elevator and signed right back to me 'L.J. Gibbs, second B for bastard, nice to meet you too Abigail.' The smirk on his face made me want to hit him so badly but then he was on the elevator, leaving me looking at the elevator like some stupid person trying to figure out how he knew I was signing. I learned soon enough, I knew his secret whereas everyone else thought he had eyes in the back of his head. He wasn't as smart as people thought he was, he was just practical and knew how to use his eyes and ears.

First time I met Tony DiNozzo he took away some of my shock that Gibbs would hire a woman like me. He seemed to be very interested in hiring people completely opposite of him, well excluding Ducky. DiNozzo hit me as a 26 year old man still stuck in his frat boy days. Which, as I discussed millions of times with Kate, he was. He was annoying, but he was an incredible agent and had a certain cuteness to him. I took a special pity on him almost immediately when I saw how Gibbs treated him.

Gibbs soon learnt that I hated being called Abigail. I used a few nasty words to show how much I really detested it and he never called me Abigail again. It was always Abby or more commonly Abs. Kate found it kind of cute that he called me that. I tried not to think about it to much.

Kate always told me that Gibbs had a thing for me. I didn't want to believe her…well actually I did, I just didn't think he would feel that way about me. First time I met him I thought he was good-looking with his silver hair and that controlling look he had but I never thought he would ever have any feelings for a young Goth like myself.


	3. jealousy immy

A/N: I promise the next ones longer. And just to clarify some things. Sorry about the whole Tony being there before Abby thing. I kinda forgot about that. So just ignore it or something. And also about the fact that Kate was in the last chapter. I meant that to be Abby talking about something that happened in the future from what she was writing about. If that makes any sense. Thanks for correcting me though. 

**3. Jealousy-immy**

I don't know what it is about me that attract guys like flies. Jimmy started working when Gerald was on leave from that gun shot in his arm. We spent months trying to figure out who that bastard was. We'd find out eventually and the outcomes weren't so good.

So back to Jimmy, he was this strange man. He was tall, thin and wore glasses that made him look kind of like Harry Potter. I noticed early on that he seemed to have a crush on me. He was kind of cute with the way he would completely stumble over his words when he was around me. My favorite was at the times when he would open his mouth, as if to say something, then shut it and then repeat. It was like I was watching this extremely cheesy movie and was rewinding far too many times. Then Ducky would call his name and he'd spaz out and go scurrying away "yes Doctor' trailing on his lips.

I also noticed that Gibbs seemed to have a strong distaste for Jimmy and I soon found out why.

Jimmy and I were in a corner of the autopsy room talking about God knows what. Gibbs stepped into the room and stopped in his tracks when he saw us. I locked eyes with him for a second then he turned to Ducky and I back to Jimmy.

It concerned me that Gibbs was acting this way. Normally he'd smile or smirk at me but all he did was stare at me. I tried to peek around Jimmy's head and see if I could see Gibbs. I could kind of see half his face and after a few seconds of analyzing the way he looked at Jimmy I realized what it meant. Gibbs was seriously glaring at Jimmy. He seemed almost…jealous I guess is the best word to use. Ducky was trying to say something to him and touched his arm but Gibbs just kept glaring at Jimmy.

I knew Gibbs was pissed and that I needed to go talk to him so I told Jimmy I had to go and gave him a quick hug. Suddenly Gibbs was storming over to our side of the room, fist balled up and jaw clenched tightly.

"Abby do you have those results on the blood splatter?" He tried to sound normal but his face was red and he was standing very close to Jimmy. When I nodded yes he jerked his head in the direction of the elevator and I started walking towards it. I heard Gibbs harshly whisper in Jimmy's ear to stay away from me.

He was leaning against one of the walls and I was leaning against the one opposite of him. His feet were kind of shifting back and forth. I had noticed the first few years that I worked with him that he never seemed able to stay still.

"What's going on with you and Palmer?" His question startled me and when it registered in my brain it shocked me.

"Jimmy? Nothing." He just nodded his head and said nothing.


	4. I swear heartache starts with a G

**4. I swear Heartache starts with a G and ends with an S**

A few weeks later we found ourselves working late all alone. I was at the computer trying to get the test to run faster. Doing my normal talking to the machine thinking, of course, that it would speak back. I'm telling you my babies talk to me. Anyway I was at the computers and Gibbs was leaning against the wall across from me. He hadn't said anything in a while. To caught up in trying to figure the case out.

Tony and Kate had gone home hours ago though Gibbs and I stayed. Work for us, unlike them, came first in our lives. I looked at the clock and couldn't believe that it was already 2 in the morning.

Gibbs' hand was attached to a cup of coffee, long ago gone cold, and mine to a Caf!Pow that long ago melted. We drank our drinks anyway, needing the caffeine to keep us moving.

The computer screen suddenly got over taken by a green flashing window telling us who our killer was. I screeched, which woke Gibbs up from whatever fairy tale he seemed to be stuck in. He pushed off the wall and walked towards me, coming to a halt right behind me.

I could hear his breathing, feel it on my neck and it was driving me crazy. His arm brushed my side as he placed his coffee down on the counter. He kept his hand on the counter and placed his other one on the other side of me, trapping me in his personal space. His face was right next to mine as he squinted his face up to try and read what was on the screen.

"Make sure DiNozzo picks her up in the morning. We don't want a runner on our hands." I didn't realize he was that close to my face until he spoke, I could feel his voice rumble through my entire body. Somehow his voice seemed deeper, huskier and I just put it down to being tired.

Even after I shut the computer down he was still standing behind me, locking me in place. "Uh Gibbs you do realize that you're still standing behind me right? Cause I kind of want to get home but I can't move."

"I know." And then I felt a light brush on my head and realized that he had just kissed my head. One hand left the counter and pushed the hair away from my neck on the side with the spider web tattoo. Then, to my complete amazement, he kissed my neck, trailing down and pushing my shirt away to kiss my shoulder.

His other hand left the counter and found its way to my hip. He flattened his palm and turned me around sharply. I found myself being pushed into the counter with Gibbs' mouth hovering over my lips.

Somehow we found ourselves in my office, him pushing me up against the wall, us making out like a couple of horny teenagers. I couldn't believe old Gibbs still had it in him. Sometime later clothing was shed and I was on top of my desk as Gibbs stood in between my legs. That moment, doing it on my desk like the world was about to end, was probably one of the best memories I hold in my head. He was just as anybody would expect, controlling yet sweet and gentle.

I woke the next morning with a pair of arms wrapped around me holding me tight against the owner of the arms body. I tried to move but heard a groan of protest from Gibbs who seemed to have just woken up.

"Hey Gibbs, not that I wouldn't love to be like this all day I seriously gotta go pee and take a shower…and that was quite possibly the most cliché thing I've ever said."

He let go of me and flipped over onto his stomach. "Oh shit." He said when he looked at the clock and realized that it was already 8 in the morning. Yeah we were late to work. But not just because we woke up late, but because 5 minutes after I entered the shower Gibbs jumped into it and wouldn't leave.

It didn't surprise me when Gibbs knew his way around my house. He'd been over here a million times before…just not ever in this context. When we left my house I realized that I had left my car at the yard and that Gibbs must have driven me home. I didn't really realize anything around me last night as we drove home. For certain reasons that could get you a heaping fine or ticket.

We drove to work silently in his car. Suddenly everything felt very awkward to me. As we got onto the elevator he was wearing a suspicious smirk and I knew exactly what he was thinking. He hit the off switch and pulled me against him as the elevator bounced to a stop and the lights flickered off.

I found myself being propelled backwards into the metal wall of the elevator. The walls of the elevator rattled loudly as he pushed me very hardly into the wall.

As we exited the elevator on the office floor, so that I could tell the team about whom the killer was, both of us were wearing smirks. His disappeared as soon as he stepped off the elevator but I couldn't seem to make mine go away. I didn't know that Gibbs had it in him to do it in an elevator. He was surprising me a lot lately.

I perched myself on his desk as he turned his computer on and then slid into his chair. Tony was looking at us suspiciously and I didn't even have to turn around and look to know he was. Gibbs looked up and winked at me and my smirk turned into a full fled grin. I hopped off his desk, his eyes following me as I walked over to Kate's desk.

"Hey Abby." I turned to look at Tony, my grin getting even wider at the look of confusion on his face.

"Yeah?"

"What's up with the huge grin and why are you late? Have a late night last night?"

I never got to answer because Gibbs had gotten up and gone to Tony's desk, without Tony even noticing, and smacked him on the back of the head.

Kate got up and walked towards me, laughing at Tony as he rubbed the back of his head.

"I've got to tell you something." I said to her as she stood in front of me.

"No you don't."

"Aw Gibbs do you always have to ruin all the fun?" I wanted to tell her so badly but I guess Gibbs wasn't going to let that happen.

"Apparently."

The secret relationship had lasted a week before an old flame tried to find his way back into my life. I tried to get Ian to leave me alone but he was insistent and constantly called me telling me he still loves me. Ian had really thought that I loved him. He was completely different from me. His hair was blonde and his eyes blue, something you'd think I'd never go for but being with him had just felt right. We had dated for a year and I don't really know what broke us up. I always just guessed that it started falling apart when I started working for NCIS and didn't have much time for him anymore.

Gibbs didn't notice until a few days later when he picked up the phone when Ian called. I was in the other room on the computer when I heard the screaming. Gibbs sounded really pissed and so I got up to go see what was up. Gibbs shoved the phone into my hand and grabbed his stuff and left. I spent the rest of the night yelling at Ian and asking him what he had told Gibbs. Ian had told Gibbs that I was still in love with him, that the only reason we had broken up was because when I started working at NCIS I would always talk about some guy. He didn't realize that the some guy was Gibbs and so he went on talking about how much I hated the guy and how he'd be all I talked about. Which, regretfully, was the truth.

I tried to talk to him the next day but he only said, "You kept something from me. You lied to me." Then walked away. After that Gibbs refused to come down into my lab. He sent Tony instead and Tony soon realized how upset I seemed. He told me to go home and I tried to tell him Gibbs would get pissed but he just said, "I don't care what Gibbs said, I don't know what upset you so much but you're going home and that's it. You can't work like this." He sounded so much like Gibbs to me at that moment. Bossy and yet caring at the same time.

It took a long time till things went back to normal between us.


	5. McGeek

**5. McGeek**

McGee had started doing some work for Gibbs and that's how I met him. Tony told me that he kept asking questions about me and I thought 'hey why not? It's been months since the whole Gibbs/Ian thing.' So I went out with him one of the times he was down in DC doing some work for Gibbs. It was great, a little cliché but in a really cool romantic way.

He started staying at my place, becoming extremely familiar with everything in it. The first night he had stayed over I made him sleep in the coffin, though he had no idea what it was. When I heard Gibbs ask McGee if he slept in the coffin the next day I thought I was seriously going to murder someone. His simple comment had Tim asking me questions for days. I wanted to tell Tim pretty badly but knew Gibbs wouldn't like that too much.

After like the fourth time he stayed over we really started dating. We went out a lot more, came back to my place and did some unspeakable things. Tony knew what was going on between us and mocked me like crazy. I didn't mind too much, I hadn't really cared about anything since that day Ian called.

The next few weeks after that phone call, things weren't very pretty between Ian and I. We fought and he finally talked me into going out to dinner with him. I went, god knows why, and figured I would just sit down and talk to him about what had really happened.

We talked, he understood and things started looking better. Until the next weekend when we went out and ran into Gibbs. It wouldn't have been so bad because he didn't know what Ian looked like but Gibbs found us in a very compromising position. I was being stupid, drunk and completely heartbroken, and so I did the stupidest thing I ever could. I made out with Ian outside a restaurant a block away from the NCIS building. Let's just say there was a lot of fighting after that and Ian and I broke it off for good. He was kind of scared Gibbs would come after him and kill him.

So back to McGee, he was staying in DC more and more because of Gibbs. We did a lot of work in my lab, flirting as usual, and not caring who saw. Kate never said anything about it, knowing that I didn't need peoples crap at the moment but Tony mocked us, coming down and making kissy noises and all that cheesy stuff. But their reactions were nothing compared to Gibbs.

Gibbs of course noticed what was going on between McGee and I. Soon it seemed like Gibbs was treating McGee worse than he ever treated Tony. I felt bad for Tim because he became scared of Gibbs pretty quickly. The way Gibbs was treated Tim was starting to tear Tim apart. He felt like he was doing everything wrong all the time and wasn't capable of doing anything correctly. I knew I had to talk to Gibbs and get him to stop it. Bad move.

I tried to talk to Gibbs one day in the parking lot but he completely ignored me. I knew the only way I'd really get to talk to him would be to corner him at his house. Wasn't the smartest decision I've ever made but it sure did change things.

His door was unlocked and I knew right away where he was. When I hit the bottom of the stairs Gibbs didn't even look up to see who it was. I knew he wouldn't talk so I just started talking, of course sounding like a total idiot,

"Gibbs what the hell is going on?" He shrugged his shoulder, still without looking up.

"Why are you treating Tim like that? He's terrified of you and you have no right to treat him like that. He tries and then you tear him apart."

Finally he looked up at me, hands stopping his work on the boat. "Tim? Oh so its Tim now?"

"Gibbs would you get over your jealously for one damn minute and listen to me?" I was getting pretty pissed off at that point.

"Ian, Jimmy, and now McGee? Any other guys I should know about." Burn. He ticked their names off his hand then signed a very rude word. He had no right. It was none of his business.

"What is wrong with you? How is my sex life any of your business?"

"It used to be." He said it quietly then turned back to his tool bench, sitting down on the stool facing away from me.

"If I remember correctly you're the one that broke up with me." I walked towards him feeling the frustration rising in me.

"It was justified. You lied to me. You hated me." He stood from the stool and walked in the other direction away from me.

"I hated you when I first met you. You remember when I signed bastard the first time I met you. How did you not know I hated you then?" That defiantly didn't help matters at all.

He turned towards me. "Why didn't you tell me about Ian?"

"It wasn't any of your business at the time. I never thought he really mattered that much."

"He must have if you were making out with him in front of that building." He started walking towards me.

"I was drunk. I was torn apart because of what happened to us and Ian was trying to help me get through it. He felt bad that he caused it. I didn't care about him. I only cared about getting over you." Now he was standing directly in front of me. His face extremely close to mine.

"Did you get through it? Did you get over me?" I could feel his breath on my face and swallowed awkwardly. His eyes locked with mine and I didn't even have to say anything. He just knew.

He went to kiss me but I stopped him, telling him that I couldn't cheat on Tim like that. He looked at me, his eyes showing just how downright pissed off he was. He backed away from me, telling me that I had to choose. Then he was back to work on his boat and I was walking out to my car, my brain to overcome by everything to even think straight. I needed a Caf!Pow pretty desperately that night.


	6. Decisions lots of Caf Pows and candy

**6. Decisions lots of Caf!Pows and candy**

When I got home I found Tim lying on my bed reading a book. He put it down and looked up at me. For some reason I felt like we were an old married couple. Ugh.

"So what happened?"

"Nothing." I kicked off my shoes, grabbed some flannel pj's and headed for the bathroom. I only ever wore flannel when I was uncomfortable with someone…no one really ever caught on, which I was lucky for. I pulled the covers back and lied down on the bed as Tim kept asking more and more questions. I ignored him and turned on my side, pretending to be asleep, but really thinking about what I had to do. I knew I was going to tell Tim it was over but I couldn't figure how to do it.

The next morning Gibbs walked into my lab to discover me on an extreme sugar high. I had already drunken three Caf!Pow's and an entire bag of candy. He walked up silently behind me and pulled one of my pigtails, causing me to whirl about on the swirly chair at the speed of light. The stress and extreme amount of caffeine in my veins caused me to topple off the chair and right into Gibbs arms. After he caught me he pushed me backwards quickly, almost as if his hand was burnt.

He told me they were going to pick up a body, kissed my cheek and left. I had nothing to do so I ate more candy, played some games and finally gave up and went to see Ducky. I thought that maybe one of his stories would take my mind off of two certain people.

Jimmy and Ducky were absorbed in staring at a body lying on a table. They were staring at something on the person's right hand and so neither really noticed me…that was until Ducky's scissors tripped me. Yes it was the scissors fault not mine. I fell into one of the metal tables, banging my head on the lamp above it and slid down the table. I was sitting in front of the table when Ducky and Jimmy finally looked up. Ducky said "oh dear," and Jimmy moved away from the body to help me up.

He peeled off his gloves and scrunched down in front of me. He touched the bump and I groaned. At this point I was pretty out of it with the sugar and all the tripping. He acted like a real doctor and not just an autopsy helper and checked my arms and made sure I didn't have a concussion. When he was done checking me over he stood up and held out his hand to help me up. Out of the corner of my eye I could see Ducky leaning over to pick up the scissors and Gibbs, Tim, and Tony entering the room.

I used Jimmy's hand to help me up, shaky on my feet so Jimmy put his hands under my armpits and lifted me up effortlessly.

He let go and looked at me concerned. "You alright?"

"Hmm well you just helped me up and I didn't complain about any pain so you tell me, am I alright?" I hated it when people asked me that question after they had helped me up or something like that, its pointless.

Jimmy shrugged awkwardly considering the fact that he was still holding my arms and let go of them. Ducky had stood back up and was looking at Jimmy and me with a knowing look on his face, he didn't know Gibbs was in the room because if he had I'm pretty certain he would have never said what he was about to.

"That whole scene right there reminds me of an old married couple I once met in…" His voice droned out when Gibbs' had overtaken the room.

"You get anything yet?" Ducky whirled about and took note of the look on both Gibbs' and Tim's faces.

"I found something strange on his right hand. A bunch of cuts all with super glue holding them shut. He defiantly murdered somebody with a knife."

Tony's phone started ringing. He picked it up despite the glare Gibbs was sending his way. A minute later he shut the phone and told Gibbs that Kate had something. Gibbs walked around the table towards the elevator, the normal question on his lips. "How Doctor?"

And Ducky's answer of course, "When I know so will you."

With one last look at me Gibbs stepped onto the elevator, his gaze shifting to glare at Jimmy and I noticed Tim's gaze doing the same.

"Doctor did I do something wrong?" Jimmy seemed concerned that he had said something wrong, turning into the paranoid McGee once was.

"Nothing at all Mr. Palmer. He's upset about something else." His gaze locked with mine and he lifted one eyebrow. How the hell did he know? I shook my head and headed for the elevator.

As I walked back into my lab the idea that that whole thing in autopsy was quite possibly the most cliché thing that's ever happened to me.

The next day the case was solved and Tim was back at his house. That's when Gibbs really started pushing me. I was about to go into a sugar comma with all the candy I was eating, not to mention the mass quantities of Caf!Pow's running through my body. He kept trying to get me to break up with Tim online or over the phone but I didn't want to because I hate breaking up that way, it's heartless. His excuse was that he doesn't care about McGee's feelings; all he cares about is having me as his again…typical possessive Gibbs for you.

For a week he pushed me so much that I finally broke up with Tim on the phone. I told him that the long distance thing just didn't work out for me. Needless to say he was pissed which put me into a state where I sat in my lab drinking a Caf!Pow at the same time as I was sucking on a lollypop and shoving skittles into my mouth. You'd think that would be hard to do but after quite a few days of all this angst and drama I had mastered the art of eating too much sugar at once.

I hadn't told Gibbs that night about the breakup. I wasn't sure how to move forward with him now. The day after we broke up he came down into my lab alone, a Caf!Pow attached to one hand and a coffee cup to the other.

I hadn't turned around when he entered the lab and so he stood there examining my body language for a few minutes. I could feel his eyes on me and so I turned around. His eyes locked with mine and hid smile indicated he knew.

He didn't say anything; he just walked forward, slammed the drinks down on a table, grabbed my hand and pulled me into the supply closet. As soon as we were both in there and he had shut the door he kissed me so passionately I thought I'd die of cheesiness. As he clumsily moved around the closet his arm hit the light switch and we were plunged into darkness, neither of us really caring. He pushed me backward and I hit a shelf, the glass vials disapproving rattling. He pulled me backward and tried again, this time pushing me up against a wall.

He was pushing me up against the wall so hard that if I had been smaller he probably would have crushed me. He stopped for a moment to catch his breath and made up for the lost mouth contact by grinding against me. I couldn't stand the fact that we had clothing between our bodies and started to pull his shirt from his pants. He pushed my hands away and ripped his shirt from his body then quickly unbuckled his pants and pushed them down. He tried to shuck them off but his feet and his pants got tangled up and he fell forward, falling into me and laughing in my ear. Finally he got his pants completely off and worked on getting my clothes off. I was wearing a white button up shirt with a red tie, he yanked the tie off my neck and unbuttoned the first few button on the shirt, exposing my upper body to him. I was wearing a short black skirt and he was rushing so much that he just pulled my underwear down and pushed into me in one quick thrust.

I didn't quite expect that to happen at work after he found out. I thought he had more control over himself and be able to hold it until work was over but obviously he proved me wrong on that one.

When we exited the supply closet we were relived to see that no one was in my lab. I had worked up such a sweat in there that my hair was sticky and my clothes were sticking to my body. I made sure all my tests were running correctly and headed for the showers. I didn't want to wash the smell of Gibbs off of me but I also didn't want to walk around all day smelling like sex. That wouldn't go over to well.


End file.
